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NBB Question from anon:
Does anyone have any experience of controlled crying in order to get bubs to settle?
Is there an appropriate age to start?
Is it something that is suitable for some babies, but flat out unsuitable for others?
Pregnancy is amazing…except when it’s not. It’s a time of great change in your body, and sometimes those changes can cause discomfort, which can be concerning, particularly if it’s your first baby.
Each mumma-to-be may experience symptoms differently or not at all. The discomforts listed here are considered a normal (although, sometimes annoying!) part of pregnancy...
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NBB Question from anon:
I'm due to have my baby in about a month, and I'm researching parenting styles. I'd love to hear experiences from mums of all walks of life who feel that they practice attachment parenting. What does it mean to you? There are so many stereotypes, but surely not all attachment parenting looks the same. I'm just really curious to hear from real mums. Much appreciated! x
Follow your instinct. I pick up bub as soon as he unsettled doesn’t matter where or when and he also sleeps in my bed. I use a carrier for when I do certain house work, sometimes when we go for walks etc. he’s just always near me. Responding always and ASAP, have bub on your pretty much and we also nap together! He is now 10 months. I never let him cry, Day or night he is my baby and I’m his safety! And also cause we exclusively BF he is on me lots as well! Totally normal. Look up 4th trimester22 hours ago
I would consider my parenting style as “attachment parentingâ€, however I don’t and never have followed any rules or even looked into parenting styles before. I just meet my daughters needs both physically and emotionally. Eg, I pick her up when she cries as she’s too young to let ‘cry it out’, and I feed her when she wants to be fed. I play with her when she’s awake and cuddle her whenever she needs. If she’s upset and doesn’t want to be put down, I don’t force her to lay in her bed by herself. I’ll rock her or just cuddle to comfort her and it has resulted in a very happy, smiling baby who knows she can count on me. Researching and going into parenthood with a certain style in mind may work for some, and it may not work for others. I’d recommend just keeping an open mind and doing what feels right to you. It all depends on your baby as well. I’ve known people with babies that just fuss and cry when they’re cuddled and would rather be put down so they also end up playing a large part in how you parent. Good luck ☺ï¸1 day ago · 20
We fell into attachment parenting very naturally. I didn’t even realise we were doing it until I read about it. My 2 year old daughter is very well adjusted socially and emotionally. She is happy and very independent - parenting her is really effortless. I can’t speak highly enough of it, but it’s also what feels natural to you as parents. Just follow the bub’s lead, that’s the best advice!22 hours ago · 2
I’m of the parenting style of ensuring my child is healthy, fed, has water, explores her toys, books, backyard etc, and knows she is safe, loved, supported and understood. I try to model good behaviour and manners, and work hard and spend quality time with her.
Don’t know if that’s a category, but that’s my goals. 24 hours ago · 2
Forget everyone else's opinions and go with what feels right. I enjoyed wearing my bub and still do occasionally at 18 months. We still co-sleep and breastfeed on demand and feed to sleep every nap and night. Our boy is thriving and has had zero separation/social anxieties so far, though every kid is different.23 hours ago
I went into being a parent with no real expectations of how it would be.Like others have said you do what you can to get sleep (our daughter sleeps with us from time to time at 13 months)I give her all day she comes first which honestly in the long run will probably cause me issues as number two is due in a few weeks but I’ll cross those bridges when I have too.So long as my kids are happy and healthy that’s all that matters to us oh and manners they must have manners and respect. 23 hours ago
I deliberately didn't read anything add I've seen to many friends crack under the pressure of trying to do it certain ways when it just didn't work.
If he was/is sad or upset I offer food, drink, sleep, cuddles, attention, play, distraction. Its nearly always one of the first 3 (even now at nearly 2 lol)22 hours ago · 1
I’ve never even heard of this... just go with your instincts... every baby is different, so are the parents. Don’t put pressure on yourself with these types of articles... I feel the same with the leap development thing and the app that goes with it... I’ve never paid attention to them because my girl might not be in that faze etc. Parenting is hard but it’s also amazing. Just be you hun 😘1 day ago · 3
I began parenting overthinking everything and googling everything but I have learnt to try not to overthink parenting. Like most of the comments here I just respond to Bub whenever she’s unsettled, pick her up and cuddle her extra if needed and I don’t follow strict timings or “awake windowsâ€. I just go by her cues. If you just follow your instincts and your Bub is happy and healthy you are doing everything right mama 😊19 hours ago
So I started out wanting to do attachment parenting full on. Like carrying bub for the first 3 months non stop etc. but as a single mum I found it didn’t work for me as I needed to put her down to shower, go to the toilet etc. and didn’t have a partner that could have taken over to simply give me a break. So I now practice what is referred to as ‘Responsive Parenting’ where if your bub wants to be carried/cuddled then you oblige and if they are happy to have a bit of independent play then they do that. I co-sleep with bub and did contact nap with her until she was around 6 months when I could finally put her down for 1-2 sleep cycles without her waking (I resettle if need be). I also don’t allow her to cry it out as I’m a firm believer that it’s their form of communication and to just ignore it makes zero sense. But I think there are so many different variations of Attachment parenting because every bub is different as is every parent and you’ll find what works for you and your bub and don’t let anyone tell you differently! 💗... my bub is a happy little 8 month old who has her moments like every person on the planet lol 😂1 day ago · 1
Honestly hun as soon as bub is here & sleep deprivation kicks in you do what you need to do to survive. There is nothing wrong in reading up on different styles but please keep in mind every baby is different & you do what works for you. Just follow your instincts 💗 also know that at the start its freaking hard work & anyone who tells you different is either lying or has forgotten how incredibly hard those first few weeks are.1 day ago · 9
NBB Question from Zara:
Hi mamas, I'm 6 months pregnant and just starting to explore Calm Birth. I'd like to know where I can find out more about classes. I'm in regional Victoria (Geelong), so I'm wondering if classes are usually in-person or online. I'd also like to hear women's positive experiences of implementing it in birth. Thank you!
Hypnobirthing Australia. We are part way through the online course, which we chose because we live rural. It has been great at easing my anxiety so far, and hopefully will be beneficial for birth too. I just hope to arm myself with lots of skills and coping mechanisms, and see what works for me when the time comes.21 hours ago · 1
I had some pretty terrible experiences with my first two children’s births so I did a face to face calm birth course for my 3rd. It honestly made the world of difference! I felt so much more aware and in control of what happened to my body. I still ended up with an epi due to complications BUT I felt so much more at peace with it because I knew I had done everything I could before it got to that point. I felt better after birth aswell because of it! I know current circumstances probably prevent face to face but I think you would definitely get a lot more out of it if you can manage it somehow. 24 hours ago
You will absolutely have no regrets doing calm birth or hypnobirthing. It is invaluable knowledge that not only assists with labour and birth, but how to be a calm parent. I did calm birth with my first pregnancy as I had alot of fear surrounding labour and birth. I practiced all the techniques and I ended up having a calm, natural, fear-free and drug-free birth. I'm due in just a couple weeks to have my 2nd baby and did the calm birth refresher course a few weeks ago, ready to achieve another gentle, calm, natural and drug-free birth.
The refresher course was an online zoom class due to covid and it was just as good as the in person face to face classes.
There are also lots of calm birth/hypnobirthing meditations for free on Spotify 🙌1 day ago
Calmbirth
I did CalmBirth when having my first son and it was incredible. I had such a positive experience. I just had my 2nd son almost 6 months ago and it was even better then my first birth. I implemented all the same techiniques. I recommended it to all my family and friends. They have all had very positive birth experiences also despite challenging circumstances. I think it is totally worth the invesment. I have also found that the breathing techniques etc also help me with daily life when dealing with stressful/anxious situations and emotions 😊💕1 day ago · 1
NBB shared sleeping space inspiration:
What do you think of bedside sleepers like this?
Image babybay USA via Pinterest
NBB Question from anon:
Hi guys, i just found out I’m pregnant with my 4th baby and I know I have to have another cesarean. I am interested to know others experiences who have had a 4th cesarean. How was your pregnancy and recovery afterwards, Also if in Victoria what hospital did you go to?
Thanks 😊
I’m currently pregnant with #4 and this will be my 4th c/s so I can’t tell you how the recovery etc will be yet however I can tell you they have put my in the high risk OB stream due to the amount of c/s I have had. They are allowing me to go full term so scheduled c/s will be at 39 weeks. (Even tho due to previous pre-term birth the expect me to labour naturally prior to this) I have not been scheduled for any extra scans or appointments at this stage and other than a few more aches and pains it’s been a rather uneventful pregnancy. They assured me at my last OB appointment I’m not the first nor will I be the last woman to have 4 c/s so there is no reason for any major complications to concern me at all. I’m currently 25+3. (I’m also in Victoria, Bendigo hospital is my local and the one I have had 2 of my 3 current children as well as the one I’m currently carrying.) Best of luck with your pregnancy. 😊1 day ago
I have had 4 c-section, three in three years, I found my 4th pregnancy my easiest. Everything was healthy no problems with the scar or anything. I found the c-section part was ok because I had more than enough experience about what was going to happen, at this point I could probably perform it 😂1 day ago
NBB Question from Davina:
I'm 8 months pregnant, and have been getting puffy swollen feet. Has anyone else experienced this and have any tips please?
I had pre eclampsia. I honestly wouldn't panic if swelling is your only symptom but definitely mention it at your next appointment. If your appointment isn't for a couple of weeks, I would pop into your local hospital for a check up. Here in Adelaide I'm not sure if all the hospital's are the same but at mine, they basically have an emergency department for pregnant women so you don't need to go to the actual emergency department.1 day ago
Have a thorough check up with your doctor or midwife. I had terrible swelling for the second half of my pregnancy and got told I was fine the whole way through. Then literally when I was in the middle of labour they did a urine test which said I had preeclampsia.
I found that putting my feet up a little more often and a comfortable pair of shoes helped the swelling go down a bit. Also I did a couple of foot soaks, not sure if it helped but it certainly didn't make things worse and it was soothing on my sore feet1 day ago
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NBB Question from anon:
Hi everyone, I just discovered I'm 9 weeks pregnant. I went to see the GP after a few day of feeling some discomfort. She insisted on a pregnancy test...turns out her suspicions were right! Did anyone else have no clue they were pregnant several weeks into the pregnancy? My periods are always irregular. I'd love to hear some other stories 😊
Yes! Co-worker noticed I wasn’t drinking my morning coffee the same. She jokingly asked if I were pregnant. I laughed it off. Then I noticed my appetite had increased, and I had moments of nausea. Decided to do a pregnancy test and found out I was 9 weeks pregnant.I wasn’t great at noticing 2nd time either! This time found out New Year’s Eve and was 7 weeks! 17 hours ago
YES! My period was running late- yes we were trying but after being deterred for some months, I just put it down to my PCOS and fibroids. I was that convinced that I was going to get my period; I had cramps! So I packed a pad with me every where just in case! But after 12 days I took a test with my fiancé by my side and there it was â¤ï¸ best news of our life â¤ï¸1 day ago
NBB Question from Nikki:
My daughter won’t take the breast so I’m pumping and giving her bottles. From one of my breasts I’m getting 60-80mls and the other 10mls per pump. Any ideas on how to increase the milk supply on the breast that isn’t producing much? I’m using a double pump so they're getting pumped for the same amount of time. Thanks.
One breast has always produced more for me and this is my third go around. My daughter is 3 weeks old and I’m getting 150ml off one side and luck to get 80ml off the other. Pumping more often will increase your supply, and porridge is great for milk production but don’t know stress about uneven amounts1 day ago
NBB question from Caitlin:
Hi FTM to be and wanted to know what exercise people do in their first trimester? Wondering what’s appropriate and what’s not? What do others do?
Whatever you did pre-pregnancy is completely fine to continue doing it as your body is used to it but otherwise light daily exercise like walking, gentle swimming is great. Also yoga, gentle Pilates etc. are great to strengthen and prep your body for birth whilst not putting too much pressure on your cardiovascular system💗2 days ago
NBB question from Jess:
Hi my question is around slow weight gain in baby when they're being breastfed.
I'm First time mum. My baby boy is 6 weeks old with an average weekly weight gain of only 80 grams (aparently should be 150 to 200 grams). its getting me down thinking that my breastmilk isn't good enough for my baby. Has anyone else had this? I see a pediatrician in a few days.
NewbornbabyFurther comment from Jess: Thank you.
- Am attending breastfeeding clinic
- have a nurse attending weekly
- have been using boobie bickies
- am switch feeding and doing min 8 feeds each 24 hrs
- am expressing up to 110ml daily that I give as a top up
Not just turning to Facebook... this was about shared experience so I know me and bubs aren't alone.2 days ago · 11
Every baby is different. As long as bubs is gaining weight, you're producing enough:) i wish my bubs would slow down with weight gain, averages 300-350g a week and is exclusively breast fed. I feed on demand (usually between 1-2 hours). Don't stress yourself out, you are doing an amazing job â¤2 days ago
Yes I had this,, no-one could tell me what was wrong,, at one stage he wasn't even on the charts his weight dropped so low,, he had reflux and turned out a CMPI,, so he went onto a allergy formula and started thriving straight away.. everyone kept telling me to top him up as he wasn't getting enough when I breastfed but he would throw it up,, he was getting enough but just wasn't absorbing it because of his sever Intolerance..2 days ago · 2
My baby gained weight quite slowly in the beginning
Wasn’t that much of a milk guzzler (formula fed)
He was also in 20th percentile for ages, would only gain 80g a week, sometimes only 30g. But he was such a happy/active baby, never really cried.
My MCHN made me sooooo anxious and worry so much and put so much pressure on me to feed feed feed.
But you know your baby better than anyone.
If they are content and happy and not losing weight, don’t stress too much.
I wish I didn’t have all that stress, I focused so much on his bottles and wish I spent more time in the moment with him. It’s hard as a first time mum, especially with MCHN being very by the book and not going by every baby is different.
My boy is now in the 75th percentile for weight and is kicking goals ðŸ‘ðŸ»ðŸ‘🻠trust your gut xx2 days ago · 5
My OB always said my daughter would be 'average' on the charts. She continued only gaining a small amount every week but tracked on the same 3rd percentile curve for her first 18 months. Now 3 years old and still average weight but very intelligent. Every child is different, as long as all other indicators are on track, ignore the scales.2 days ago
It's no unusual for babies to actually lose some weight after birth. My son lost a bit and took about 6-8 weeks to get back to his birth weight with breast feeding.The big question is, how many wet and dirty nappies is he having a day? Does he seem to be content (sleep well, cuddle well, breast feed well?) They're normally the best indicators for whether or not he's getting enough breast milk.Try extending your breast feeding times or offer it more often. Be sure to feed on one breast, then give him some on the other. Also, pump the main breast afterwards until empty and then the other for a little longer. You need to try and empty the first breast and then take some form the other, this tricks your body into thinking he's needing more and then it produces more.Sometimes it doesn't work and a lot of women experience supply issues. If you do have to turn to milk to help supplement what he's missing, don't be too disheartened. It happens sometimes.2 days ago
I had the same situation. My lactation consultant had me express a full feed, then left it to sit and separate. They wanted to see about 80% fatty milk and max 20% watery foremilk. Mine was 10% fatty and 90% watery. Turns out I had hypoplasia or insufficient breast tissue. I started combination feeding with formula and my daughter thrived2 days ago · 1
My baby only got back to her birth weight at 6 weeks, she was really slow to gain and it was stressful as. Lots of people told me to switch to formula but I stuck it out and then all of a sudden she started gaining and now she’s almost 18 months, still breastfeeding and is super chubby!2 days ago · 6
You can try and increase you’re supply with boobie bikkies or something similar. My daughter was slow to gain weight as a little bub, and now is also in the lower weight range for her age group as a happy healthy 4 year old, but it’s just in her genetics, she’s very tall, but quite thin. She eats like a horse, and is fairly active. Just remember that all babies aren’t the same, if you’ve got good supply, and baby is putting on weight, seems content and drinks regularly try not to stress yourself out too much. 2 days ago · 1
my baby gained weight very slowly. some weeks would be just enough. some weeks as little as 30 grams. the week before paeds she lost 20g. my baby was happy and had good colour and was growing in length and head circumference along her growth line. weight dropped from 50th to 5th percentile. I got a pump and was expressing 150ml of a morning off one side so I dont think my supply was an issue l. it took her 12 weeks to gain 1kg . I swapped her to formula and she gained 1kg in 2 weeks and has flourished ever since. my paediatrician did say to me that yes breast is best but only if it works and sometimes it just doesn't work2 days ago · 4
That is fabulous!! Your baby is gaining weight😊 you should be proud! If there's plenty of wet and dirty nappies- that's amazing! You should be concerned if your baby is loosing weight. Mchn have guidelines they follow and read from so that's probably why your told your baby isnt gaining enough. All babies are different! As long as bubs happy and healthy otherwise I personally wouldn't be stressedðŸ˜2 days ago · 1
If it’s a supply issue you can boost it using Milky Goodness cookies. Otherwise there are many other reasons babies put on lots of little weight. I wouldn’t worry yourself too much. My babies were huge weight gainers and yet they’re completely normal in size now. Some weeks babies gain lots and others little. Try not to stress yourself. If bub seems content then I’d say they are getting enough. 2 days ago · 1
Make sure your are getting plenty of rest, healthy meals and LOTS of water. Hard I know.Your body takes what it needs, then the rest is pot into your milk. Can't give bub what's not going in. â¤
I always felt like eating nuts helped my supply. Maybe the fats and oils? 🤷â€â™€ï¸Maybe bub isn't getting lots of hind milk? Maybe longer feeds each side so bub is getting plenty of hind milk.2 days ago
There is some great advice in this thread, but as long as you're producing milk, your milk is good enough. My bub was really slow gaining weight too.. some weeks only 10-30g. I could hear him guzzling yet was being told I didn't have enough milk 🤦ðŸ»â€â™€ï¸ Turns out he had cow milk protein intolerance. I was expressing and topping him up, which actually meant he was losing more weight! Not suggesting this is your case, but this is a really great (and supportive) BF group you could join www.facebook.com/groups/thebreastfeedingcooperativeaustralia/?ref=share2 days ago · 1
My daughter is 8 months old and she has only gained just under 4 kgs from birth and sitting in the 20th percentile still, she is formula fed and on solids 3 times a day and still only puts on about 80g a week. MCHN and Doctors are not worried as she is healthy, happy and has good amount of wet and dirty nappies. Try not to worry your bub might just be a slow weight gainer.2 days ago · 2
Had three, first baby did not have enough milk for him, comp fed with formula for three months. Second baby fed for 6 months then placed on solids and formula, Third baby fed till she was 3 1/2 years old (joked she was going to go to school and still want boo boo). Whatever happens please take care of yourself and do what is most convenient for you. 2 days ago · 1
Please join the Facebook page
The Australian breastfeeding project support page!
Every baby is soo different as are adults.
If bub is growing taller and head circumference is increasing. Is reasonably content bad has Atleast 5 wet or dirty nappies in 24 hours then they are likely getting enough. Some gain more some weeks and less others. â¤ï¸2 days ago · 2
Some babies take a while to put on lots of weight. I would take notice more of: are they having lots of wet nappies, are they happy/content when awake, do they seem satisfied after a feed etc. Trust your instincts - if aside from the slower weight gain, you think baby is doing well, then trust your instincts. ☺ï¸2 days ago
I would recommend seeing an ibclc to check that your baby is transferring the milk sufficiently.
I know how you feel... I had the same with both of my babies. It turned out they couldn't get the milk out well, even though I was expressing large amounts. Still so many told me I just didn't have enough milk, or it wasn't 'good quality'. I expressed and topped up until my oldest was strong enough to feed properly (6 months) and until my youngest had his ties lasered.
It's hard work and emotionally exhausting when it doesnt happen the way it 'should' but I promise it will get easier.2 days ago · 1
Look into made to milk they have a great range of lactation goodies, also speak to a lactation consultant to ensure you and bubs are getting the most out of breastfeeding. There is also medication that can be prescribed if you are adamant on breeastfeeding but do have a low supply. The nurses were concerned with my bubs currently now 9weeks and putting on 160g each week now which is the minimal amount but she is happy, has a lot of wet and dirty nappies and is growing. I was told the charts in the blue book are mainly worked off formula fed babies. Follow bubs cues if there are minimal wet nappies and very upset most of the time then there's time to be concerned, also if bubs is vomiting can be another reason or flat/inverted nipples. Everything is a factor but definately check in with a lactation consultant. You are doing a great job breastfeeding is handwork and takes time to master. Has there been any suggestions of tongue/lip ties?? Can also make feeding difficult. Goodluck mumma you got this.2 days ago
Haven’t read other replies. But always good to also go by, is the baby settled and content, are the number of wet and dirty nappies what they should be daily? Is the baby sleepy? Is there a reason the baby is being weighed weekly? Is bub feeding well at night time and the early hours of the morning? All good things to be noted
Feeding on demand always works best, and ensuring you Fully feed on one side (which can take up to 40mins or more) to ensure that good hind fatty milk has come down. And always good to offer the other side as well, even if they don’t finish it.
Sounds like you have all the bases covered, and sometimes not just looking at the weight but also looking at all the other factors that ensure the baby is getting enough milk.
Breastfed babies often feed on demand and often feed for long periods of time
Ensure you are expressing only after a feed also, and don’t go by what you express as to what supply you have, as your baby is much more effective at getting milk than an expressing machine
I assume now at 6 weeks old attachment is good and there are no issues with tougue tie?
Sounds like you are searching and making appts in all the right avenues. I hope all continues to go well 2 days ago
All 3 of my babies were slow to gain weight. Try not to worry and look at other indicators: is baby settled after feeds, sleeping (as can be expected for a newborn), wet and dirty nappies etc if all yes (like mine) then really try not to worry. Seeing a Paed is good for peace of mind and to rule out any medical issues but from my experience, some bf babies can just take a while to put on the weight. Stress will only hinder ur supply. Try not to second guess yourself, a gain is a gain in my opinion. Bubs isn’t losing weight and IS gaining so I would say youre doing great Mumma. Hang in there, it’s hard when you are told the gains aren’t “enough†but try not to focus too much on what is considered “normal.†Good luck x2 days ago · 5
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